Tag Archives: thoughts

Protected: A Letter

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Just thinking aloud

Whoever said fights make people come closer must have said so under the influence of cheapjack alcohol and distasteful drugs for there is no buzz of excitement or anything, just a bad hangover to nurse, that’s all. I for one seem to have a doctorate in this department. Put me in an awkward situation, I smile and ignore as much as I possibly can at first, throw a harmless (yet sarcastic) fit, bid a supersonic clarification as a final counter and when all else fails, start a verbal war. You see, I have the shortest fuse known to mankind wedded to a vicious tongue. So, our wars are everything but honorable. It’s ugly & offensive; painful & quick. No one dies but the soul chokes up a few times and picks itself up in no time but somehow, the pieces don’t fit the way they used to- there is a word for it I think, I don’t know. Patience may not be one of strong suits but I always (always!) make an effort to see the other side of the argument despite seething blood gushing through my veins. Even when I don’t have an urge to justify, I feel I owe it to my sheer existence as a woman to stand up for what I believe in at all times. As though, a clever (or a loud) comeback somehow justifies the fact that a bazillion womanlikes from motherland are hushed without sound logic making way for a patriarchal society to thrive and grow.

Anyhow just wanted to get that off my chest. I hate fights! Moving on.

I’m 28 weeks today. A little wobbly, liking my food super-spicy, working out almost every day, painting furniture and shopping baby stuff to create a small nursery for our winter baby. This is probably one of the best years of my life and I’m reveling in the melodrama as much as I humanly can. Here is what month of July looked like! + a hundred other things of course.

A sweet secret

I’d always imagined that I would be pouring my heart out (in this space) every other day during this time of my life, but that has not been the case for some reason. Honestly speaking, I have a million happy thoughts and a million terrifying thoughts tussling with each other all the time and I don’t know how to bring control to this mental commotion. I’ll figure it out eventually, I’m sure.

I was at home all of Feb and March. Thanks to US Govt for the incorrect dates on my work permit, I ended up paying a price for a mistake they made. Now that I am back to work, I can heave a deep sigh and talk about it as if it was no big deal. But then, it WAS! Now, the thing about staying at home is an interesting one, I really wasn’t prepared to stay at home to begin with, didn’t know how much longer I’d have to wait to get my corrected work permit so it put me in a difficult spot with my employer. But then, everything worked out just fine eventually. Continue reading

A month full of surprises

February has jolted us beyond belief! One surprise (shock?) after another and I’m still cluelessly playing catch up, well I’m hoping to catch up with my own life eventually if that makes any sense. I’m in limbo land hovering between nervousness and excitement failing to clear something things up in my head no matter how hard I try. Continue reading

We turned two.

‘It’s different now’ they said. ‘Being married is not the same as dating, just remember that.’ they reiterated. And I had no idea what my married friends were talking about, well, if I didn’t want to give into indulgent refinements after marriage, then why go lengths to stay together? I thought to myself and shrugged it off.

We’d hit the half yearly mark and I started telling myself, “He is doing this on purpose!”, “He doesn’t love me anymore!” because that’s how it felt. We’d wake up combat-ready, getting on each others’ nerves day after day, week after week, reaching that ‘You did it first’ ‘You said that first’ phase. When my favorite song was being aired, he was quick to change the radio station just to piss me off and Continue reading

Reason # 2687 why I love my MIL

Yesterday evening, my husband and I were struggling to get some packing done for the big move this weekend. My phone rings and it was MIL who’d called to see if I can help troubleshoot her iPad glitch. I was covered in dust and running around frantically, so I asked my husband to help her out. It only took a few minutes to explain how to fix the problem but then, he went on to make sure that her privacy settings were OK, activate two-step authentication, update software (techie OCD??) and so on. It took him a little over an hour to get the darn iPad to work like it should. MIL hurriedly said her byes, wished us good night and Continue reading